Prayer Request for For Ewe Hellen, nelleh
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Posted:Jul 15, 2008 4:51 am
Last Updated:Jul 21, 2008 4:29 am 4355 Views
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I just opened my email this morning to find that Hellen has just come home last night after being rushed into emergency surgery last Thursday.
I don't know any details but I sure hope they finally found out what has been ailing her and that she is on the road to recovery.
I don't even know if she wants this information out publically but she will have to get better to kick my butt over it.
In the meantime, please join me in praying for her recovery and that this might be the end of her illness.
Thank you!!
PS: Hellen: if you are reading this, GET BACK TO BED AND REST!!!
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Move out of the way, here I come
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Posted:Jul 14, 2008 4:40 am
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2008 9:04 pm 3610 Views
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Ahhh another fun filled Monday before me...
While this is my least favorite day at work, it is often the one that I accomplish the most. I know tonight I will come home dead tired but with a feeling of accomplishment.
So I will make another mocha, take a deep breath, put a smile on my face and set loose toward the freeway into the city.
Watch out my fellow rats, I'm racing for the cheese today!
Have a great day everyone and even though Mondays typically suck, there are still plenty of blessings and little victories out there to get us through the day. God rocks!!
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Ready, Set... Whoa!!
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Posted:Jul 13, 2008 9:15 am
Last Updated:Jul 14, 2008 9:30 pm 3583 Views
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As I have been writing about relationships, commitment, perception and so on lately, I have felt overwhelming confirmation that with as much work and commitment that it takes for a couple to survive these days, I'm not ready.
I think as individuals we also need to explore our needs, wants, desires, passions, beliefs and boundaries. A lot of people have no idea what they want or how far they are willing go for what they want.
The statement, “I’ll do anything for love” is a misnomer for me.
I think we all need to individually decide what our own personal priorities are and where our boundaries lie before getting into a serious committed marriage/engagement/long term relationship.
It's easy to say we all want the fairy tale. But let's face it, Cinderella hasn't worked since she left for the castle. Meanwhile I leave my castle every day to work. The fairy tale is a bit more complicated with reality these days. The reality is you have to work and communicate in relationships. It takes more than just being in love with the idea of being in love. Even in my own fairy tale, I would expect any man in my life, who I have professed love, be my best friend. Those kinds of relationships take time. They don’t happen overnight. You have to take the time to invest in one another.
Floridagal2 posted a beautiful view on having love find you instead of going out searching for it. She is confident and encouragingly hopeful that love could be just around the corner. I agree that the more your chase love, the less chance you have in finding it. It really should find you.
However, I’m not ready yet for love. If it is right around the corner then I’m across the street sitting at the Starbucks and staying on my side for a while. I’m starting to finally get my bearings in life. I bought my own place which I want to fix up a little here and there.
Of course, right now I am just celebrating like crazy to have hot water! Rome wasn’t built in a night and it is so evident that the family that once lived here pre-foreclosure days, had lots of rough and tumble little rug rats. It shows on the walls in the room that I now call my office. A little one who shouldn’t have had crayons and felt markers but yet did once play in this room. I think we have all been there, either as a or as a parent. LOL
I have so many desires right now and so many responsibilities as well. Each of these items needs my devotion and concentration. They are priorities for me which rank higher on the list than a long term serious romantic relationship.
Plus I am finally feeling pretty content with my life. I end up with enough drama as it is in life. Why complicate it with someone else in the mix? Plus I don’t want the extra housework.
Will you do anything for love? I won’t. I don’t want to. I don’t have to. I like things the way they are in my life and to me, a serious long term relationship is added work and complication at a time when I am trying to simplify my life.
And truly it wouldn’t be fair to string anyone along for the ride…
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My Nickel - My Response
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Posted:Jul 12, 2008 7:35 am
Last Updated:Jul 12, 2008 5:40 pm 3561 Views
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Due to the fact that I can be one of the wordiest people on the blogs often filling myself with enough hot air to blow up the Underdog balloon in the annual Thankgiving Macy's Christmas 4 hour sales pitch and promotional parade.
(Watch the preshow and you will get to see the World Famous Rockets, the cast of whatever is hot on Broadway right now, a whole lot of lip synching plus bands, cheerleaders and dancers from high schools all over the US. )
See what I mean! A wee bit wordy I am indeed!
hejsan5 published a post about perception and what is a man to do in a troubled marriage.
The post truly made me think about the relationship we have with Jesus and what kind of relationships we should have with one another. Are we not to pattern ourselves after Him to the best of our ability? Are we not to do our bests to mirror and have Him shine through us in our relationship both with Him and with others?
Can you hear the wheels of my mind a turnin' now?
I started to write my response and the words just kept flowing. So instead of posting a partial book and taking up his blog with my long winded response.
I decided to post it here instead since I sort of got carried away.
Here is what he posted:
The bible often talks about Jesus and the Church in the same context as man-woman mariages. Love the woman as yourself etc etc..
But what should a man do in a troubled marriage?
My late father once told me that the difference between a man and a woman is that the man in a troubled marriage, first finds a new woman and then leaves his wife. This way he would not be alone. The woman obviously interprets this as if the man left her for another woman but thats not what actually happens. Or is it?
Women can also be perceived as emotionally stronger than us men and almost impossible to understand. Their language and ability to verbalise their feelings and emotions is hard to match, so the easy solution is - out!
Comments please...
And now without further adieu...
My Nickel - My Response
I shouldn't even comment on this one but I think the man should do his best to communicate with his wife. He could promote that they can share their burdens and trials together as a team. Just as we share our burdens and trials with Jesus.
The man obviously saw something so special at one time in this woman to have married her. Can the man remember the woman he fell in love with? Is the woman also capable of remembering the man she fell in love with? Are you both still there somewhere deep inside each other's hearts?
Jesus sees something special in each of our hearts. Uniquely unique we were created. Not saved into sameness but saved just the same. If we have any relationship with Jesus Christ whatsoever, then you already know what a servant's heart He has. Does the man and/or the woman in this relationship have a servant's heart? Are we so not influenced and encouraged in our relationships that we are so unmoving now not to serve another, even each other, the very One/one that we have said before that we loved so and could not live without?
Or have both hearts grown so hardened and cold that niether recognizes the other anymore?
My suggestion is for much communication especially with God first and foremost. They don't call Him the good counselor for nothing!
Through our faith in Jesus, He is our hope when there seems to be none. If anyone can soften a heart, Jesus certainly can and we don't even have to pay long distance... we just hit our knees!
But is that what either party even wants?
How committed is the couple to their marriage as individuals?
We know Jesus is committed in our relationship with Him. His word is full of promises that He fully keeps.
Are both members committed to the marriage because if one is not, that person is exercising their freewill and is making a conscious choice not to come to the party.
Are both members faithful? Just as Jesus is committed to us, we must be committed to Him. If it's a true successful marriage, it takes communication, work, committment, faithfulness.
How does your faithfulness play out in lining up the next partner?
As a woman I don't know if I want to even entertain thoughts of being with a man who has cheated on his wife. And getting a partner before a relationship is finished in the eyes of the law and our Lord is considered cheating in my book. As a woman that is my perception.
I bet there are a lot of court judges and attorneys that can see infidelity coming a mile a way. Some big bucks have changed hands due to infidelity over the years.
I am unsure if I could trust a guy who has cheated in the past. There would be this little piece of doubt there way back all the time.
If you want the best out of any sort of relationship: with Christ, with friends, with a marriage partner, with a parent, with a , with family: You MUST be committed, you must communicate/pray, you must be faithful and you better be willing to work and grow with that person. The more you put in, the more you get out of it.
Consider it your spiritual 401K. Jesus not only matches but gives you more than we could ever put in. If you truly care about the other in the marriage, you would want that other to be your everything in life, your soulmate, your Lord and you would be willing to invest well into it.
However if niether party sees any reason that the marriage is not worth putting out the effort to save, continue or grow, then by all means...
Go ahead and get someone else to fill the void. But examine first what you may be leaving behind first. Then end that relationship before you start a new one. Be a man or a woman. Stand up. Be honest. Call it quits if you're gonna but don't be sneaking around behind people's back. If a man or woman does not want the dying of their marriage to be considered as being caused by an affair... then don't have the affair. End the marriage first...
If you cannot think about serving your ex, then think about this new person in your life. Is it fair to subject that person as well as your future relationship to all the crap a long messy divorce can dredge up? Does one/One have any respect for any of the parties involved? Are they willing to show that respect and refrain until business is settled.
Do you feel so cold, emotionless and dead inside that you believe another will make you feel better to get through whatever pain you have inside?
Do you still want that 401K?
Then invest into it. Just make sure your partner isn't Enron! And yes, sometimes you have to roll it over. But if you don't follow procedure you can lose a bundle.
You never lose however when you invest into your relationship with Jesus!!
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Working for the Weekend!
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Posted:Jul 11, 2008 4:24 am
Last Updated:Jul 12, 2008 8:19 pm 3482 Views
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The end of the work week just cannot come fast enough for me but yet I still have so much to do at the office.
This week has really kicked my backside to say the least. I am sure the exhaustion shows in my eyes as well as my step, although a few mocha locas this morning may perk up the latter.
Going into Friday morning, I am about two hours behind on where I am normally am at on my work this time of the week usually.
I have worked OT three out of four days this week so I am beat already. But I know I can make it through today and tonight, I am going to once again melt with so much gratitude into that big tub filled with bubbles. I am so blessed that I have this haven where I can wash away all the stress.
My bathroom is a place of sanctuary for me. I can't tell you the number of times I have prayed and cried out to God while sitting in a hot bath.
It's my place where I let everything that has built up inside me and beaten me down go on down the drain.
Man, it was so wonderful to get in that tub last night and come out pruney and feeling like Jello. His word says there is always room for Jello. Ooops sorry Father God... that was Bill Cosby that said that.
I have high hopes to get much done this weekend but I know that if I do not get it all done, it won't kill me.
I plan to move everything around in my kitchen. Going into having such a big kitchen was such a large change for me. My previous apartment had more of a kitchenette than a kitchen.
When I first moved in here, I just wanted to get stuff out of the boxes. Now I am finding that where I put certain items is just not as practical as if I moved different items to different places. Who knew I would have so much trouble trying to decide what goes into each of my 13 drawers!! LOL
I am so looking forward to this weekend. I am especially I am looking forward to taking my Saturday afternoon nap! LOL
Some times it's the simple things in life... like afternoon naps and hot bubble baths... that are the sweetest.
Yes, I live a charmed life. Truly I do. I am extremely blessed and I can never say Thank You enough to Him for all His provision. It isn't always exactly what I wanted but it's always just what I need. Thank You Jesus!
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My Date with Mr. Bubble!!
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Posted:Jul 10, 2008 9:03 pm
Last Updated:Jul 14, 2008 4:12 am 3440 Views
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Wooo Hooo! Going without hot water for six weeks sure makes you appreciate it when you finally do get it.
I would have never been able to make it as one of those pioneer women. I like my hot bubble baths way too much.
The large garden tub was one of the big selling points on this house. It's has sucked not be able to take full use of it except when I was boiling water and hauling it back and forth from the stove.
Well Plumber #3 showed up this afternoon, installed the heating element and viola' I have hot water...
See my toes?! They're pruney!! Thank you so much for all who have been praying for me on this subject. I am extremely grateful to have so many friends stand in victory with me on this.
Thank You Jesus for hot water! I am so very blessed!! I can't imagine living anywhere that didn't have clean hot water. And to think most of the population of the world does not even have adequate sanitation and clean water.
I can't even get my mind around how it must be to try to live like that.
I am indeed so very blessed....
and so very pruney!!!
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Small Victories - Big Praise
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Posted:Jul 10, 2008 4:53 am
Last Updated:Jul 10, 2008 8:56 pm 3415 Views
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I only have a few minutes this morning before I jet off into the big city for yet another day at the salt mines.
First let me say how grateful I am that I am blessed with a job where I get to sit in a/c. I don't know how manual laborers do it in this heat and humidity.
I did survive yet another craptastic day and I must say I have been so tired after work that I have not had the energy to harass anyone or get into any trouble. LOL
I called the plumbing company yesterday - Home of Plumber #1 and #2. The good news is that they were able to get a hold of a heating element that should fit my water heater. Plumber #3 is expected between noon and six tonight. So possibly, maybe, could it truly be, I just might have hot water when I get home from work tonight.
I usually stay a bit later on Thursday nights and pick up some OT. So perhaps I will finally get my hot bubble bath straight out of the tap tonight.
I don't know if I should look forward to it or try not to get my hopes up but a part of me really wants to claim victory over this so I think I will.
Praise God for hot water!!
While I am at it, I can think of lots of things for which I am praising God.
Praise God that my work week is only five days long! Praise God I just have two more days to make it through until the weekend. Praise God my mother can come over to meet Plumber #3.
Praise God I had enough money in my account for Dominoe's last night. Praise God they delivered in about 20 minutes.
Praise God, the buzzer just went off on the dryer....
The dryer? Oh sheesh, gotta run or I'll be late for work.
No matter where I look there is always someone worse off than me no matter what stupid things are tossed my way. Even during the craptastic times, there is still more tastic than crap.
I am far more blessed than I deserve in so many ways and for that I praise Him!
Have a great day everyone and count your small victories with big praise. It will change your outlook tremendously!
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A day late and a dollar short
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Posted:Jul 9, 2008 4:39 am
Last Updated:Jul 10, 2008 4:27 am 3422 Views
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Happy Wednesday folks!
So far it seems like I have had two Mondays already this week. I was asleep before 10pm last night I was so exhausted.
Now as I look forward to another hectic day at the office, I know I can choose to look at this day as what could be the start of the third Monday this week for me or a whole new day that while will be busy, no doubt, but will be surviveable and manageable.
Besides God gave me enough hair for three people, if I need to yank some out again today, I'll still have plenty left.
Talk about a blessing! LOL
Have a great day everyone and God bless you!
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If it walks like a duck...
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Posted:Jul 8, 2008 5:30 am
Last Updated:Jul 9, 2008 4:26 am 3087 Views
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Okay so she may look like my aunt but she doesn't sound like my aunt...
Eh Hellen!?!
LOL - It was indeed a blessing to talk to Hellen on the phone last night. She's a riot! Yep, she's crazy enough to fit right in my family despite the accent. Of course hers is more of West Coast Canadian accent. It's less stuffy, more laid back, comfortable... I do expect we will be calling back and forth more so in the future.
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Perception Picnics & Pitfalls
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Posted:Jul 6, 2008 6:01 pm
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2008 9:00 pm 3250 Views
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Perception is a funny thing. For instance, we can see a picture of someone over and over again and form a certain perception of that person that may be nowhere near who they really are. Or we can incorporate a stereotype to their geographical location and be totally off base.
As we get to know people better our perception of who someone truly is improves. Although often that doesn’t become crystal clear until we meet someone face to face. (And even then we can be deceived or have a wrong perception of someone but eventually who they really are will come out.)
For example, right here in blogland, a group of bloggers were blessed to get together for Terry's BC Bash. I have so totally enjoyed reading all the reports and through them I think I have been able to get to know some of the bloggers better.
I have this perception that Terry who sounds like the hostess with the mostest hasn’t sat down since this whole bash began and I spent she has spent a lot of time in the kitchen and making sure everyone was totally comfortable.
I can picture Jan dancing because I know that is her passion from what she has revealed in her posts. The 70s jam sounds very cool to me, guitars playing and lots of singing. I bet it was an awesome time for all.
Dundeal (Bill) for instance has written a lot about the bash. Much of his writing has given me a much better perception of not just the people he met at the bash but of Bill himself.
You see I don't know Bill very well but I have seen his posts for about three years now. He always posts nice things, is pleasant, polite and cordial but often his posts reveal very little about what makes Bill tick deep inside. I know he and Charie are totally devoted to Jesus and love their like the dickens. But I can never picture Bill being anywhere but sitting on that comfy chair with a book in his lap.
When he wrote about how they were all singing and playing instruments, I pictured Bill in that chair and my mind's eye was conflicted about him being out by the pool watching the . Did he take the chair with him?
Of course not! But my perception has him always sitting in that chair smiling and waiting to dispense some niceties and things to make us all smile.
Maybe men are just a bit more stoic than some of us women as many of us tend to wear our hearts on our sleeves in the blog and reveal way too much. Sometimes it’s not always a good idea. I have found some men I perceive to think with their emotions in blogland from time to time and let it out for all to see. I truly respect those who aren’t afraid to come out from behind their monitors and let the chips fall where they may.
Accents can really throw me for loop as well when I do get to speak to someone in person. I fully expect my Canadian friends as well as some of my northern US friends to pop out an "eh" every now and then.
I have never spoken to Hellen by phone but I would expect her to say "eh." Rod lives so far north of Dallas he might as well live in Canada and I have heard him use the expression.
Perhaps it’s a pre-conceived notion about Hellen as I continue to get to know her through emails and posts. I must admit that I do have other pre-conceived notions about Hellen. She looks so much like my mom's much younger sister who I am quite close to that I cannot help but to transfer some of those feelings to Hellen.
In fact, I even showed my mom her pic last night. Even my mom agrees that Hellen looks more like my aunt than my mom does. Hellen and my aunt are also closer in age than my mom and my aunt.
As I mentioned I am very close to my aunt. As a , she used to take me as a little girl on her dates with her. Oh the parties in the desert! I so remember being places I wasn’t supposed to be much less remember! But it was a different time back then. Teenagers could relatively safely have parties in the desert. However, it does make me wonder what Hellen was like during her teenaged years. Has she hidden a secret wild teenaged rebellious period that we don’t know about?
Hellen is a friend who appears as the voice of reason to me. That’s my perception. She always comes up with some reasonable view that I never even considered. And I have to step back and think about it. The “Hmmmmmmmm” moments in life when we all grow a bit by looking at things by a different perspective.
Geometrically, I perceive Hellen as a friend who always shows me a different angle. I feel that my friendship with Hellen helps me grow spiritually. She can tell me that I am wrong in such a way that I don’t feel like I am wrong… It’s like she “suggests” a different view. She will put a bug in my ear that I can’t help but to step back and consider and it’s been enlightening. I think I look into the mirror more with Hellen as my friend. I know she cares about her witness and I think she cares about mine enough to tell me what she truly believes. I so totally respect that. My perception of Hellen is that she is a very intelligent, beautiful of God with a very big heart and compassion enough to put up with my whacked out sense of humor.
Rod, despite the use of Canadian expressions, appears on the blogs to be this jovial go lucky sort who occasionally reveals a deeper side of himself than just toilet humor. In fact, on the phone he is much deeper. He is the only man I have ever spoken to that has offered on the phone to pray with me first and for me right then and there.
To me, that speaks volumes about his character. In the south, most have preconceived notions that Yankees (those living north of the Macon Dixie line) tend to be rude and obnoxious, not hospitable or friendly.
If we could get rid of that “eh” thing and the passion for shoveling snow, Rod could become an honorary southerner.
What’s sort of sad is that I can never remember where Rod is actually from. I know it’s one of those really cold, winter for six months, frozen tundra kinda states up there somewhere near the Great Lakes.
But yet, I consider Rod to be a very close friend. He’s one of the good guys! Someday when he is ready, some little Yankee gal is going to get a wonderful God fearing husband.
I was blessed to get to speak with Penelope on the phone early thirty this morning. She has such a prim and proper accent. In fact, her speech is polished brighter than a Rockerfeller's silver tea service. But it didn't take me long to hear the wonderfully quick witted, humorous girl I know from chat and the blogs.
She is so much more than just a pretty shining voice. Part of her appeal is that even through the telephone her passion for Christ shines brightly through. She is incredibly anointed but she’s still just as eccentric as I am.
I think my accent, or lack thereof, may have thrown her for a bit of a loop last night. After all, I don't really have an accent. I sound like an average American but not a twangy Texas girl. I don't think I am always as animated on the phone as I probably seem in chat or in the blogs. While I do use regional colloquialisms and Texas deep fried slang, I don't believe anyone could guess I am a Texas resident by voice alone.
Now when I was blessed a year ago or so with a phone call from Eli, I knew my perception of her was spot on. She is such a strong passionate warrior for God. Talk about an amazing woman! She sounded like she was very much down under… down under a swimming pool. The connection was so bad that we both sounded like we were underwater. But even then, she revealed so much of her heart in that call. I perceive her to be a blessing to every life she touches.
I spoke to a man in Hawaii when I first began online chatting many, many years ago. After a couple of years of exchanging humorous banter in a particular general Christian chatroom followed by weeks of emails, we exchanged . I was not prepared for his accent by any means. It was very soft, lilting and sing song like. His voice while definitely masculine had a strange feminine quality to it.
In fact, it bothered me greatly. I kept thinking in the back of mind that here this guy sounds like a molester or something.
After about 10 minutes he revealed to me the "or something" part. I don't think it was necessarily his accent but my perv meter just went through the roof.
We didn't speak much longer after that and I felt the need to disinfect my phone. Mind you, I am not a prude by any means but some things do not need to be discussed on a first time phone call and he was waaaaaaaaaay too far out there for me to be comfortable in the least with the direction of the conversation.
My perception of the guy totally changed in one 12 minute phone call and while we were cordial to one another in chat for the next few weeks, it wasn't long before we stopped talking all together.
I have been blessed to meet face to face over the years with many I have met first online. Sometimes my perception was way off and I was pleasantly surprised. Other times my perception was right on and those people were exactly who I perceived them to be and our friendships grew. And others scared me to death because they were so far away from what I perceived and it wasn't good. In my early years online, my discernment lacked greatly and I’ll leave it at that.
Sometimes you meet awesome folks but you just don't have enough in common with to see each other on a regular basis especially with the price of gas these days.
I wonder how I am perceived at times. I try to reveal who I am here but I also must do so with a bit of a guarded heart because let's face it, the internet is not always a safe place. His word says we are to guard our hearts.
The friends I have come to know online and then through emails, phone calls and finally personal meetings totally understand this concept as our friendship grows. And as it grows naturally, we learn more about each other.
One of my best girlfriends I met online. Some of you may remember Roberta who used to blog here at BC. She is everything she represents online! We talk to each other on the phone all the time, email back and forth and we have been able to get together in person a couple of times. We hope to do more so but both of our lives as single working parents are so busy.
She has been such a blessing to me. I am very grateful and honored to be her friend. I know I can call Roberta and tell her absolutely anything. She won’t judge me, she listens, she prays, she’s like a sister to me.
Like Hellen, Rod, Eli, Penelope, Roberta also so totally glows Jesus. There is no denying it.
I hope that I can be like that. I hope that people can perceive my passion for Jesus and how even though I am so not perfect that I am a of God who loves Him more than anything. I hope people can see my compassion and humanity online. And I hope that while I am screwing up right and left, falling down, and saying the wrong things constantly, that they will see that I always run to Him.
I truly hope people see Jesus in me because if not, then I need to go back to the mirror and work on some things as God continues to work on me. And believe me, God continues to work on the total overhaul of what was/is Corrie that was first started when I first came to Him.
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